Instilling a Love for God and Leaving a Legacy
Do Your Children Know You Love God?
Most Christian parents would rank knowing and loving God as the most important value to instill in their children. As followers of Christ, we have experienced His eternal worth, His mercy, love, and forgiveness. Charged with the task of discipling your children, how do you go about instilling a love for God? The simple answer is to demonstrate your love for God. Telling and showing are two different things. One is more effective than the other.
You demonstrate your love and care for your children in countless ways. You work to provide food and shelter; you prepare meals and help with school work; you wash clothes and make sure they stay healthy; you cuddle and comfort them; you play with them and discipline them; you listen to and spend time with them. These actions of love speak louder than your words. The same is true when it comes to love for God. If you were to ask your child what you love, would God make the list? What evidence is there in your daily life that points to your love for God?
Demonstrate Your Love for God
Early one morning several years ago, I stopped by the house of some friends, to drop off a book. I walked into the kitchen and sitting around the granite top island were the three children, their mom, and dad. Dad was reading aloud from Psalms while the children and mom slurped down their cereal, seemingly disinterested in what dad was doing. At the time I was struck by their lack of attention and disrespect for the reading of the Word. Over the years, I have reflected on that encounter and view it quite differently today.
Having watched the children grow to be well adjusted individuals, who have a meaningful relationship with their parents, and grounded in their faith, I see the value of what was imparted that morning. Dad’s regular reading of the Bible communicated not only its importance to him, but the importance of sharing it with his beloved children. It demonstrated to his children, his love for God and His Word. This practice of devotion is an example of family worship.
Practice Family Worship
Family worship is setting time aside each day for the family to join together in worship or devotion to God. Creating this habit in the home, demonstrates to your children a love for God and communicates the value of this most important relationship. Family worship time generally includes reading from the Bible, singing one or two songs (accompanied or not), and prayer.
The Word of God is a treasure to pass on to our children. All Scripture is inspired by God, and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work (2 Timothy 3:16). His Word is a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path (Psalm 119:105). Hiding His Word in our heart, will help us not to sin against God. The Word of the Lord stands forever (Is. 40:8). It is everlasting, and eternal. There is not greater gift to impart to our children than a love for God and His Word.
The Lord is worthy of praise and adoration. Singing and prayer are also a part of worship. Sing praises to God, sing praises; sing praises to our King, sing praises. For God is the King of all the earth; sing praises with a skillful psalm (Ps. 47:6-7). Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; for it is pleasant and praise is becoming (Ps. 147-1). Worship comes from the heart; make a joyful noise to the Lord without concern for perfection. Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth. Serve the Lord with gladness; come before Him with joyful singing (Psalm 100:1). End with a prayer of thanksgiving and need. Depending on the age of your children, the reading, singing and prayer may take just five to fifteen minutes.
Overcoming Challenges to Family Worship
Some of the challenges you will encounter in practicing family worship include carving out time, consistency, resistance from family members, and having younger children who may be wiggly, inattentive, and distracting.
Time and Place
Every family is different, so it stands to reason that family worship time will look different for each family. Done at breakfast, after dinner, or before bed, family worship can be incorporated into an existing routine. Children of all ages can take part. Aim for a daily time together so that the practice of family worship becomes a habit. Consistency is important but do not let the fear of failure keep you from starting or resuming. Failure means you are doing something, so failure is progress.
Resistance from Family Members
If family worship or devotion has not been practiced in your home, it may feel awkward at first. Older children may be resistant. Dad may be reluctant. Take this into consideration as you begin. Choose a book from the Bible with short passages, like Proverbs or Psalms, or find a good family devotion book that includes reading from the Scripture. The families at Covenant Academy use Long Story Short (Old Testament) and Old Story New (New Testament) by Marty Machowski, which are good for all ages. One of my personal favorites is New Morning Mercies by Paul Tripp. Centered on God’s grace, this book is appropriate to use with teens.
Another helpful resource for parents is Family Worship by Donald Whitney. This small book can be read in one sitting and will leave you inspired and hungry for family worship. One of the challenges Whitney (2016) addresses in this book, is the reluctant father/husband who does not know how to get started.
…when a man awakens to his spiritual responsibilities in the home, but because he has failed to lead family worship for so long he feels embarrassed to begin now. Or he fears the sneer of some member of his family when he says he wants to begin daily family worship. Or he is afraid that he is not capable of leading in family worship. Or he is ashamed because, even though he has tried something like this before, he did not stick with it (p.59).
Wives, be supportive. Encourage your husband and refrain from offering a critic. Although dad should lead family worship when he is present, he can assign others to pray or sing if he is uncomfortable starting out. Whether dad is unavailable or unwilling, family worship should not be neglected. If you are a single parent, consider that the Father of All resides in your home and will help you in modeling your love for Him.
Disinterested Children
Beginning the practice of family worship when children are teenager, while challenging, is not impossible and every bit as important. Their often-busy schedules, homework, friends, and phone will be obstacles to overcome. Expressing the value of this time as a family will encourage them. Discussion at this age can be rich and deep, if time allows.
Elementary age children can select the song, participate in discussion, and even read part of the Bible passage. Try a choral reading where everyone reads together or read-pausing every now and again for children following along with their Bible to complete the missing word.
If you have active little ones, involve them in turning pages, bookmarking, and prayer. Sing songs that are repetitive or have hand motions. Hold them in your lap as you read. Give each child a responsibility-like retrieving the Bible, clearing the couch or table.
Begin Family Worship Today
Remember my story of the family eating cereal while the dad read. Even though the children were all doing something, everyone was together as a family, with dad reading from Scripture and conveying the importance of this practice.
Regardless of the obstacles, there is no time like the present to begin regular family worship.
Let your love for God and your desire for your children to love Him, motivate you to start today. Demonstrating your love for Him will leave a lasting legacy.
Whitney (2016) reports Samuel Davies (1724-1761), Jonathan Edwards’ successor as President of Princeton, had this to say about family worship,
“Consider family [worship] not merely as a duty imposed by authority, but as your greatest privilege granted by divine grace” (p.36).
Resources for Parents
Give Them Grace by Elise Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson
Family Worship by Donald Whitney
Long Story Short (Old Testament) by Marty Machowski
Old Story New (New Testament) by Marty Machowski
The Big Picture Story Bible by David Helm
The Faithful Parent (A Biblical Guide to Raising a Family) by Martha Peace and Stuart Scott
The Gospel Story Bible: Discovering Jesus in the Old and New Testaments by Marty Machowski
The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones
The Ology: Ancient Truths, Ever New by Marty Machowski
The Radical Book for Kids (Exploring the Roots and Shoots of Faith) by Champ Thornton (4th-8th grade)
Wise Up: Ten Minute Family Devotions in Proverbs by Marty Machowski
Reference
Whitney, R. (2016). Family worship. Wheaton, IL: Crossway.